Thursday, March 3, 2011

27 - "summer camp" love affair

disclaimer: contains adult content. reader discretion is advised.

i find a lot of things fascinating with this city, but ive come to realize that what makes this city so unique are the people in it. there are three types of people in cape town: locals, tourists, and models. since i belong to the last group, ive decided to totally adapt to the character and eat, breathe and live like one. what ive found the most interesting, however, is the way they conduct themselves in "flirtationship" (a term coined very carefully as to not be mistaken with "relationship"). all models come from different parts of the world and whether or not they have relationships back home, that fact all goes down the drain while in CT. while youre in a land full of beautiful people, temptation will haunt you down and it will become very difficult to stay loyal and attached, if you are. whatever "fling" happens here in CT can be easily compared to as "summer camp" romance. everything is done very quickly because models are only here for 2-3 months. so the cycle goes like this: boy meets girl, boy kisses girl, boy asks girl for a date, boy takes girl home and does the nasty, they are in total romance mode for a week and they are both in cloud 9, boy sees another girl, boy becomes an asshole to girl to wean her away, girl gets heartbroken and bitchy, boy uses this as reason for breakup, flirtationship ends. and the vicious cycle continues. this can go on about 2-3 times for the average person.

both male and female models are sluts that change partners as often as they change their swimsuits. there are a few rules ive come across from guys: "do not sleep with a girl that your friend had already fucked". for girls on the other hand, it's "make sure he's not sleeping with anyone else but you". these rules sound very easy to follow, but trust me how often it fails especially for the ladies. i have a few girl friends here that have sworn over and over again that men are assholes and there is not one left in the city that is a "good guy". after hearing this i took it as a self challenge. mostly because ive never had my heart broken by a guy well enough to consider them "assholes", and two, i am a firm believer that there are still great guys out there - only stupid girls. lastly, chivalry is definitely not dead. so because ive become so intrigued by this whole ordeal, i thought that the only way i can prove my theory is to live it. yes you read that right. sort of like, "when in rome, do what romans do". but instead of following the cycle, i will do it how i normally date men - in a very smart and "dont fuck with me or you wont know what hit you" way.  it was easy enough for me to partake in this experience because i totally reinvented myself when i got here. i can be whoever and whatever i want to be in a place where no one knows who i really am and the life i live back in TO. it's a great time to be adventurous and live a pseudo life the way i want it to. it's having my cake and eating it too, but at the same time being careful not to get too fat. you know what i mean?

but since im not really entitled to be doing this sort of thing i had to come up with a few rules of my own:
1) no sex (like really... i can reinvent myself all i want but my morals will stay put - no ifs or buts!)
2) dont fall in love (i wear my heart on my sleeve, so this is my greatest challenge)
3) play the game right (it's all clean fun) and have a variety (do not get attached to ONE person - it's an experiment afterall!)

not to be all conceited, but i have not ran out of men chasing after me - all my friends can attest to that. i dont know how to put that in a more humble way. that's just how it is. even though im a serial monogamist, ive always had male suitors that try to fight for my attention. it was no different when i got here in CT. my first male suitor was a male model. that one was easy for me to resist - I DISLIKE MALE MODELS! but he was persistent, sweet, and not to mention gorgeous. but still i wasnt buying it. what i hate most is being played like a fool and this one would just be setting myself up for distress. but when ive decided to finally partake in this experiment, i decided that i cant be biased. so i had an array of men: the model (x3), the photographer (x2), the driver, the local (x2), the boy next door, the backpacker, the rastafarian, the friend, the friend's friend, the friend's friend's friend... that's all i can remember right now. oh and this is irrelevant to the topic, but just for comical effect, i've had a couple of females as well *shudders*.

but because this is a travel blog and not a dating journal, i will leave out the details and just go straight to the conclusion. my theory was correct. that there are still good guys out there, but it takes a smart woman to find them. you have to play your cards right and only go "all in" (literally?) when you're sure you're going to win. that's whats wrong with some women who act like they're the victims when relationships go sour. they give in too easily. the bets are high and their cards aren't played right at all. sure luck has something to do with it as well but it takes a lot of wit, charm, personality and brains to win over the right man. when im having girl venting nights with my friends and they all talk about their men adventures and how they're "all the same", i sit there and quietly sip my cosmopolitan, and they turn to me and ask, "how the fuck do you do it, woman?!?!" i give a sly grin and shrug coyly; but in my head i say, "i keep my legs crossed".

but just to cleanse my karma, there are some things that went wrong with this experiment. it was all done in vain and deceit and it can be considered manipulative to an extent. but it's not all so bad. great times and conversations were had. i make excellent company and i gave them hope that not all girls are "easy" and some do have self respect and can carry a good conversation with sense and pride. as for me, i love this whole game, from the chase to them actually falling for me. i feel triumphant in a weird way. i know it's messed up, but that's exactly how it is. i can also consider it as revenge for the ladies who had their hearts broken. i have a friend who said i play this dating game like a man. how i can easily detach myself from all feelings and emotions. contrary to that belief, that's the actually the biggest failure of this experiment...

i know after reading all this i probably sound lunatic and i should check myself to an institution. fear not, i actually go to meditation classes every tuesday night just to clear my head and restore my mana. i will go home soon and keep all this as learning experience. i have no regrets living the best of all worlds. i am one blessed mofo.


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note: i am sick in bed with the flu and this '"controversial" creative writing totally helped me pass time. please check your judgements at the door and click out if you're hating. peace xx.

2 comments:

  1. No hate. Just love. Especially like

    "i love this whole game, from the chase to them actually falling for me. i feel triumphant in a weird way"

    Amen. However, I think it depends on the goal. Don't have to keep legs crossed if you don't want to see them again but definitely keeping legs crossed rule applies to someone you want to fall for you. :D Love this post.

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  2. Looks like the trip to CT was a good decision. All I can say is ur such a smart cookie. Take the good leave out the bad, learn from it and come out a winner. I'm so happy for you that you spread your wings and made it happen. Papa is smiling @ you right now saying......that's my apo!

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